I have a blog?

And its about weightloss. Which, by the way, hasn't been happening lately.

I've practically forgotten about this little spot. I've been coming on the computer about every other day, but haven't really had much to say. I've been extremely busy around here, and the computer hasn't been my #1 priority.

So, what's up, you ask?

Well, I still haven't been following points. I'm trying to eat healthy though, and I have to admit that anytime I eat something, (unless its a regular meal, of course) I reach for the frosted mini wheats. Can I tell you how much I LOVE that cereal!?!?! I'm not a big cereal person, not a big breakfast eater, but this stuff is sooo good. And even though the calories are a little on the high side, its high in fiber, so that makes it good in my book.

I've started going to the new gym. Last week I used my 4 day free pass, and went Tuesday through Friday. And I was so sore! Every part of my body hurt! I complain about it, but I really loved the pain.... it tells me that I actually worked my muscles! I've been meeting my SIL and we motivate each other. Its nice to have someone to talk to while I sweat and we also get to keep in touch and keep each other updated about the kids.

This week, I was offered a position in the daycare. My SIL works in there, and gave them my name. I babysit on Friday's for 2 hours and get a free membership! That works for me, because it gets me socializing, I get a baby "fix", and I don't have to pay the $50/month to work out.

Oh yeah, and when I worked out yesterday, I was doing the ab machine. The one where your arms go down, and knees go up, all while tightening the ab muscles. I was on my 2nd rep and felt this awful pain! It felt like a combination of something bursting, something ripping, or someone stabbing me in my lower stomach! The pain was horrible. I think I must have done something to one of my muscles. That's never happened to me before, and the weights were only set at 30 lbs! And of course, a person never realizes how much they use their abs until they hurt. And I figure I know that I at least still have something left there within all the loosy goosy flab! But its still hurting today to the extent that anytime I cough, turn, or bend, I feel the same stabbing sensation. Just going to have to wait till it heals, I guess.

Anyway, last week and tomorrow I'm using a "no weigh in" pass at WW and I have to get back down to business. My smallest jeans are a tad bit too tight on me. Before summer they were loose! And I refuse to buy bigger clothes again!

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Another book full

In WW, when you go to meetings, you use a weigh-in book. I can't recall how many weeks in each but its 20-something. My weigh-in today filled in the last spot in my third book!

Anyway, my weight today was down .8lbs. Not spectacular or anything but a loss. I kinda lost the "control" from Wednesday on, so considering that, I was lucky to have lost what I lost.

Otherwise, we have a new leader! Jen and I are very excited about this, because our old leader was about as motivating as a rock. Listening to today's meeting has me actually thinking I can get through this week. Plus, I'll be starting the gym this week, and my aim is to use up the 4 full days of trial that I get. So... as long as I can keep my eating under control, I might be making a comeback! I just might start losing weight again.

Even if I'm pms'ing.

Halfway through

Wednesday is approaching, and I haven't fallen off the wagon yet! Even though I know not to totally focus on the scale, I'm a have-to-weigh-everyday kinda gal. Scale this morning showed roughly 181, so I know I've at least lost a little water weight.

This morning Jen (my sister) and I went on a long walk at a local beach. Although it wasn't hard core gym time, it was a little something to get my metabolism going! My eating today hasn't been the best, but I'm trying to stay focused. I'm feeling better self-image wise, even to the point of wearing a pair of "skinny shorts" today.

I can honestly say, I'm not freaking out over what I eat this week. Considering the gross food I ate last week, I know even if I eat moderately healthy this week, that the scale will show some good numbers.

Next week I'm getting down to business though. The gym I'm going to join has a 4 day trial time, and I'll be using that all next week. And after losing mostly water weight for this week, I'm really going to have to work hard next week to lose at least a pound or two.

I want to switch up my eating next week too. Basically I stick with whole wheat pasta, turkey ham, grilled fillets, chicken and fresh veggies. But, I get a little nervous with recipes that have multiple ingredients. The points really seem to add up.

Any food suggestions would be appreciated!

183.6 lbs

Holy shit! Didn't weigh-in last week, so in 2 weeks I gained 5 lbs exactly! This crap has got to stop.

The thing is, I don't want to do this WW stuff anymore. I hate the thought of counting points again, hate the thought of having to exercise.

Yet, I hate weighing what I do. I hate the shitty feeling I have from not exercising, from not eating healthy.

Back when I weighed 247 and started losing the weight, I was happy to get down to 200 lbs. When I got below 200 I was even happier. I felt sexy, I felt more comfortable in my own skin. Then when I got down to my lowest of 171, I felt downright skinny. In a sense. I was still unhappy with how I looked, but in comparison of what I looked like at almost 250, it felt good. I was a tad bit more comfy wearing form fitting clothes. Now that I'm up an addition 13 pounds from that point, I might as well be 247 again!

I feel like shit, and that means I need to do something about it. A part of me doesn't want to though.

So, starting today, even though I weighed-in yesterday, I'm back on the bandwagon. I need to get SERIOUS about this. How many times have I said that already???

Sometime this week I'm joining a new gym. Its too inconvenient for me to go back to the Y, since Molly no longer goes there for preschool. Plus, my SIL is a member of this new gym, and I'm convincing my sister to join. Therefore I'll have 2 workout buddies. Which means I'm almost always guaranteed to have someone to MAKE ME GO!! If I have to go 5 days a week to stay on track, thats what I'll do. They have t.v.'s on their treadmills, which is a plus, just in case I need to go alone, and the membership fee includes all classes, which I could use to shake things up a bit.

I've got to get this extra weight off!

On the nonweightloss front. Don't know if anyone reads this blog or not, but just found out yesterday from my SIL that the story about her brother is in the new Woman's World. I had wrote about it in my other blog, about how her brother needed a liver transplant after a bout with the flu. He had a defect from birth and ended up being very close to death. His mother, Karen, had donated a part of her liver and now he's doing so much better! So, if you read Woman's World, and there's a story in there titled "What would you do if your child had only 72 hours to live?", its the same story I wrote about months back. And he's doing much better. Really strange though to actually read a story where I know the people and I know what happened in "real life". You can find some of the posts in my February archives.

Thats all for now. I'm going to try to get back to writing here a bit more often. And even if I write about how I hate all of this losing weight stuff all the time, I think it'll make me more accountable for my actions.